I had a revelation about a month ago. I was on a particularly difficult run. About 5 minutes into the run, I hit a wall. In the past, at the immediate onset of heavy breathing or aching thighs, I would have stopped. I am not a runner (or so I used to think) and my motto always was: if it hurts, then why do it?

As I started my third week of running, something began to change inside. I started celebrating the hard part of the run. I knew that it was temporary. I knew that aching and heavy breath was not necessarily a bad thing. It meant I was growing. It meant that what was on the other side would be something I didn’t even know I was capable of. And before I knew it, the strain and aches diminished and I was running as if my legs were connected to my heart instead of my brain. I was running easily and without effort. And I was having fun.

I am getting married in three days. This week, I have been calm and cool and giggly. I have been having the time of my life. Everyone has commented that I’m the calmest bride they’ve ever met. And my response has been, “Why not?” Why not enjoy the process and celebrate? There’s no need for stress! Pshaah!

And then I hit a wall. Last night, as my house filled with people and I basked in the glow of our families coming together, I was suddenly exhausted. I wanted more than anything to jump up and down with joy. THIS has been what I’ve been waiting for. This is my dream come true. As people laughed and chatted and ate pizza, I hit a wall. And I was annoyed with myself for hitting a wall.

I excused myself and got into bed early. I listened to what my body needed. But my mind started to race. Throughout the night, I tossed and turned and fought against myself. I started worrying that I wasn’t going to get enough sleep. That I was going to get sick. That I wasn’t going to be the bride I wanted to be. That I would miss all the fun.

And then I remembered my experience several weeks ago on that difficult run. I told myself that the hard stuff is the good stuff. These feelings of exhaustion and worrying need to be experienced. If I fight against them, then all of my fears will come true. But if I relax into them and allow them to happen, I will find myself on the other side sooner. And the other side will probably be better than my wildest dreams. I just have to get there.

I woke up this morning exhausted. But this is part of the process. I’m ready to experience ALL OF IT. The joy, the fatigue, the nerves, the jubilation. Bring it on.

taking a moment to relax…with my favorite purple sandals.

The final pose of most yoga classes is a relaxation pose called savasana. In savasana, you lay on your back and release any tension from your day. You celebrate the practice that you just completed as your breathing returns to a light, natural pace and you melt into the floor.

Sounds great, huh? Easier said than done.

Several weeks ago, as my yoga class came to a close, I struggled with what seems to be the easiest yoga pose of all. After all, I was laying on the floor in the peace and quiet of the yoga space with no strain or stress (not visible, at least.) Within that peace and quiet, my mind wandered, I started thinking about the sandwich I was going to have for lunch, wondered if it was okay to lift my hand to scratch my nose, and couldn’t stop hearing the noises of the outside world.

And then my yoga teacher said, “The only thing you have to do right now is rest.” And BOOM. Just like that, it clicked. Yes, I was hungry and yes my nose itched and yes there was a car alarm going off outside, but the only thing I needed to do at that moment was rest. And that’s what I did.

Ever since that day, I’ve returned to that memory on my yoga mat whenever I felt overwhelmed. When looking at my “to do” list at work, I picked one thing and said to myself, “All I have to do right now is what’s in front of me.” After a particularly difficult run that got me a little lightheaded on my walk home, I said to myself, “All I have to do right now is breath.” As I write this blog post, I’m starting to think of all of the wedding-related things I “should” be doing. But instead, I’m telling myself, “The only thing I need to do right now is write.”

I take pride in being a master at multi-tasking. Like many others, it’s one of my main selling points when I’m interviewing for a new job. “You know you want to hire me! I can do twelve things at one time! Watch me juggle!” But I’m starting to wonder if that is really something to brag about? I’m starting to realize that there are several positive side effects of concentrating on one thing at a time. The first thing that I feel when I concentrate on one thing at a time is any feelings of overwhelm that I typically carry with me slowly start to diminish. That antsy, anxious feeling that has become so prevalent in our fast-moving society disappears. The second is that things get done with more thought and with better results. The third is that I enjoy the process more. And isn’t THAT what life is all about?

Want to try out my new yoga-inspired technique? Here are a few recommendations:

1. Slow down your thought process. When you do, you will realize that you are juggling too many things at once.
2. Once you’ve realized that your brain is on over-drive, stop what you are doing and BREATHE. Long, luxiurious breaths for at least 30 seconds.
3. Pick one thing from the constantly growing “to do” list in your mind. Pick the thing that will make you feel the best if it is completed.
4. Do that thing and nothing else.
5. When your mind starts to wander, acknowledge that it wandered. And then re-focus on the task at hand. Release any judgement of yourself. Instead of thinking, “Why can’t I stop thinking? Why can’t I just do this one thing? What’s wrong with me?” I recommended lightening up and going easy on yourself. Give this one a try: “Ha! There went my mind again! It’s a wanderer!” We are hard-wired to be thinkers. It takes time and practice to shake those thoughts and just do the thing in front of you.
6. Complete part of the task. Sometimes you can’t do it all in one sitting. But celebrate the accomplishment of doing one thing at a time.
7. This is a process. The first time you try this, you may only get through step one. But that is one step further than you were the day before. Just being aware of your multi-tasking thoughts is a step in a postive direction.

There will ALWAYS be other things we want or think we need to be doing. Always. If those things are on our minds 24/7, we’re going to start to feel guilty. We’re going to feel like we are in a rat race – always going and doing and speeding through life. We’re going to get tired and burn out. So, my friends, slow down and take a deep breath. The only thing you need to be doing right now is exactly what you are doing.